Ask Dr. Reece - Who Dropped the Soap

Dear Dr. Reece:
I have a new BF who likes to get ready in the morning in the same shower and bathroom.  He just does "everything" with me right there in the bathroom.  I'm not a prude but I like my space.  I mean, I feel like I'm in a prison movie!
Duane R..

Dear Duane:


Ah, boundaries!  How we miss them once we let them get away.  You've given away your personal space and the rights to your personal space and now your mind is wanting to get that back.  I can't blame it.  I'd want to skip the prison toilet scene, too.


Chances are your BF just assumes this is the way things are done because he has had some past where it was the norm.  You have to tell him there is a new "norm" around here!  Break it to him gently and plan to get up early so he can have the time he is used to to get ready.


Also, if you are romantic in these times, explain it is not a rejection of romance but that you simply need your space in the morning.   Remember, boundaries are our friends!


Best,
Dr. Reece

Dr. Reece Manley, America's Favorite Online Pastoral Counseling and GLBT Spirituality Expert can be found at http://www.pridecoach.net.